Can this real

When a rat steal your breakfast

Hmmn

Hmmn! Soldier life in not easy oo.
(I mean to learn & do soldier's training is not easy). Let me gist u one thing about me and my master whose my trainer:
Me: Yo! Sir, good morning.
Master: Morning (in a frankled faces)
Me: Sir! I'm ready for the training.
Master: Ok! Why would you wear long trouser.
Me: nothing sir!
Master: Masterkraft!
Me: Yes sir!
Master: Sit on the fire.
Me: You say?
Master: I say sit on the fire!
Me: sir, what concern fire in training to be soldier?
Master: Assume a house is burning, you need to enter the burning house and safe all the insects in the house cause their life are also important!
Me: Master! Ke pa re.
Omo, I quickly step on J

Wow! See a funny actions>>>
There is one man beside our house which people named him "Lekulodo". He is like a mental-human but not also a mental-human. So one day on a sunny day, He left home to buy garri, he buy garri come home but he forget to buy sugar and groundnut. So he put the garri on the floor cuz he his senseless! He went to buy sugar at the 48th house far from his home. So these big big rats came to his home, Him to also forgets that he has many rats living with him thats why they named him "Lekulodo". Before he enter his house, he noticed something dragging the garri nylon > so he take footsteps silently. Suddenly he entered, he found the three big big rats dragging the garri nylon. He is also smart cause he is also a local hunter, so he catched one in these rats.
Has me was sitting outside, I noticed a voice, could you believe what? The man lay the rat on a bench and started beating its body! I shadow whats happening and say "Such a fool person". I now realize why they give him a nickname.

#morning_joke
That small twins girl no know wat do am, When i dey house jejely con dey browsing. She suddenly ran to me and shout "Brother! Brother com and look snake, it has want to enter my twin sister bumbum"
I too do like person wey ready to fight snake and rush without handling any tool to hook the snake!
I reached there and asked "Twins, Where is the snake you went to called me for?" I don't see any snake am just looking around all the hidden places & holes to found the snake. Suddenly both twins laughed together, and they both shout "Hoobbi, Its April fool"
I be like slap dem but i realize i also fool them that "A Rat is smoking"!

What are the words that contains consonant letters only and sweetable to pronounce such as... Without no stress-pronounce?
My own exmp: Hmmm, Hmmmn, Shh!
What of yours?

What make u dating ur boyfriend / girlfriend?
Vote & drop ur cmt. I wanna know if there is true love in life!

• 33%
• Money

• 0%
• Beauty

• 33%
• Habits

• 33%
• Real love

• Total votes: 3 · Final results

If you still remember the movie titled Bahuballi. Where was bahuballi died to?
1). During the first war of Kalekiya.
2). During the misunderstanding between him & balla.
3). During the second war of Kalekiya.
4). During the time he is chasing the miscellanous lady.
5). During the fights on hills.
!-No google search pls-!
#remember
#indian
#movie
#bollywood
#comment
#brain_teasing

Which color is the most beautiful?

• 0%
• Yellow

• 25%
• Green

• 50%
• Blue

• 25%
• Purple

• Total votes: 4 · Final results

Paul have started again now!
Girls pls be smelling your boyfriend before you hug him.
Today when we just play football finish, all our trousers were dirtied with sand dust.
Suddenly, paul girlfriend's called him and told him to meet him in her workshop. Guess one thing that paul does? He don't bath all the dust away and change his cloth but he just put some little water on his hand and use it to clean the dust on his trouser! I laughed till i fall down and he said "Thats how nigga does!"
Boys that don't do this, is that how all boys do?

You see! Its happened again!
One guy dey chat my girlfriend on facebook, He message her say "Hi" and my girlfriend also replied him!
For not too far... As they were both chatting, the guy text her say "Baby have you bath, Have you also eat?"
By the day evening, my girlfriend gist me all about what the rubbish guy is texting to her!
By night, I message the guy same on facebook and he also replied me cuz he no get work always online.
I text him say "Bro, why u dey question my girlfriend that have she take her bath?"
He replied me that "Say nah you pretend like the girl am chatting with, so how did you know?"
I replied him "Am not pretend cuz am not living fake life! Its my girlfriend told me all your fucking msg!"
He sent the laughing emoji and i reply "Why laughing bro? Dey play?"
He also replied "Bro you are not serious, Is nah only go date that pretty girl?"
I replied that "You are also fool! If i can't only date her, then lets cut her into two!"
I gave him blocking and last msg "You dey mad bro!"

It have being 5years now that have been rearing male & female cat which i named them "Roghed" & "Twilight"
I always look them forward anytime. They has born many kittens for me and resale. So I always shadow everywhere, everycorner to see how they mate before impregnanted. Guys, I have never found them mating at anywhere! Please are they mother of jesus?

GAME PLAYING:
#Brain_Teasing
#Memory_call_back.
18 years ago, Who is the president of your country?
Me: lagbaja!
What of yours?

Good Morning YoCliqers!!
It has happened again¿
I was sitted outside playing music on a loud speaker, Though the music sound is getting me feling sleepy.
Suddenly I heard a low footsteps...I rise up to see whats going on.
"Whats happening here? Questioned myself.
Nobody can believe this that the thing i saw was incredible!
Oh, thee take one leg up, thee put one leg down, thee take another leg up, dee put one leg again.
I swear, It was a dog dancing to my music playing!!

Its happened again!!
That man, who was our neighbour have started his usual behaviours again.
It was monday night part 10pm, I turn on the generator
That our neighbour arrived from the club and start dancing to the sound of my generator.
I questioned myself: "what happen to this man?"
I replied myself: "Oh! He has drunk too much of alcoholic drink, thats what make him dancing to the sound of generator!"
So, i too start mimicking him and feature him in dancing. He start eclaims "Hey, huh, yeh, haa , huh, yeah yeah" to the generator sound. Suddenly i off the generator and say: "Can't you see its night, why are you shouting!"
He asked me: "Who sing the song" (He mean the generator sound)
-I laughed and replied: "Its petrol and cabulator that sing the song!"
He tell me to replay the generator sound as music for him, then i ignored him outside.
Please if i make you laugh a little, then follow me @masterkraft #boysmile.

#Today
Who is he? The mother asked,
I screemed, BoyAnup! Whats meaning of all this jargons?
Though nothing happen. He replied;
I shouted "Lets go home" But i don't even know what he was doing with the mother, I just go home angrily and left him there.
I returned home, Mom said "Fawaz, Where are you coming from and so where is your younger brother?". I don't know what to say becuz i left him with one another's mother, though i don't know what they planned to do, but i guessed! Becuz he too like rubbish!
So i replied mom as a prank: "That my brother fucking another mother"!
Now i don cause trouble with that big prank i lied on him, No way to retell mom that what i said recently was full of prank!
How do i do this? She call Ndubuzi who lives beside our house and was also a Man O War to come and hide at the back of door, when BoyAnup enter-in and he should grap and punish him!
Me I just ran away to our family nearby house to stay becuz i regret of being make a prank for mom!
Guys, What should i do now??

DM me if you need how to make emoji & emoji text-code for post/any other thing by yourself!

#UPDATES, #NEWS:
Oh Sorry, People living in Burundi.
In 2022, (GDP) It was listed that burundi is the NO.3rd most poorest african country in the world.
What of 2023, (GDP) same burundi was also annouced and listed as NO.2nd poorest african country in the universe!
In this year 2024, (GDP) march 28, Burundi is still also onway to be the NO.2nd poorest african country in the world!
What make this exist is that their resources & incomings are very & too low, also low of commodity, low of labour, low of industries, low of nature gift!
I thank God for country i am! "Nigeria" is the 2nd richest african country in the worldwide for 2023! But 2024, it has not been announced or listed!
Claim it now, If you are very so so proud and proove of your african country, Drop your country name below comment and lets sees the best & worst!
#AFRICANIANS, #NEWS

Vote for your most stubborness and wickedness wild animal here:

• 50%
• Hyena

• 25%
• Wolf

• 0%
• Cheetah

• 25%
• Leopard

• Total votes: 4 · Final results

NEW SUGGESTION!
@tynash, Please help us replace the post comment page title. What i'm saying is that the: "Post | Yocliq" is making me misclick. Assume i offline and i want to came online back, Now on my browser history, i'm looking for the post i planned to comment on before offline but i could not find it, All the history page title just displayed as "Post | Yocliq" so i need to click all the history before i can find the post i wished to comment on. And so what i need you to do is that please help us to display the post title as little as 20 characters of the user text content. But if user post media only, then title can display as POST BY THE USERNAME!
#YOCLIQ members that understand what i wrote down, is that suggestion good or not? Although me to am webmaster so i have good opinion to make us IMPROVE YOCLIQ as other popular social media!

HI GUYS, YOU CAN'T BELIEVE THAT ALL MUSIC YOU DOWNLOADED ON AUDIO MACK CAN'T PLAY ON MP3 BLUETOOTH VOICE PLAYER. THE BLUETOOTH CONNET MP3 VOICE PLAYER SUPPORT .mp3 FILE ONLY BUT AUDIO MACK MUSIC ARE .ACC FILE! EG:
(audiobeat.acc)
(dancebeat.mp3)
ASSURE THAT IF YOU PUT YOUR PHONE HARD DRIVE, TF CARD (memory card) INTO MP3 BLUETOOTH PLAYER, ONLY dancebeat.mp3 will play on MP3 BLUETOOTH PLAYER!
IS IT UNDERSTANDABLE OR I SHOULD EXPLAIN BETTER?

SOME THINGs YOU CAN'T DO WITHOUT ONE THING.
1. You can't write 2000 words without puntuations! Unless your sentences were meaningless!
2. You can't woke-up and go out while closing your eyes! Unless you are bling! (God forbid)
3. You can't eat any food without passing your mouth! Unless you will feel hungry till day!
4. You can't press your phone for 5hours without your thumb! Unless, other fingers can't be convinience!
5. You can't take your bath without your hands! Unless take your leg over and use it to pour water!
6. You can't conversiate with ones, whose place is far without your MOBILE PHONE! Unless you send a letter through an errands!
7. You can never eat hard foods without your tooths! Unless you grind or swallow!
8. You can never gave birth without your pussy! Unless you go for an operation! (God forbid)
9. You can never cut a tree without metal tools, hand or machinery! Else if the wind/air/vehicle collapsed it!
10. So, Never taught you can live good life without WOMAN! Unless you were lonely!

STORY TIME
LIKE, SHARE & COMMENT PLS!
This is a true life story of a guy who was 29years and lived in unknown area.
In the same unmentioned area, There was a young girl called "Enny" who was an 18years old and graduated secondary class.
The guy always steared at the young girl whenever she passed through his house on errands way.
-> The guy feelings is to lay the young girl on the bed. So one day of a fool day, The young girl parents were not at home, so the guy run to the young girl house and shout "Enny pls come my home, there was a big snake hidden over!"
The young girl says "I too, am very afraid of wilds, pls leave me alone!"
The guy replied "I know, but just come and stay with me to make me not feeling scared"
The girl accepted what he said as an elder guy he his. So they reached the guy home > room.
The girl says "Where do you found the snake?"
The guy replied "Move forward to the refridgerator and shadow at the back of it....
(DM me If the story is intresting to you, for the rest of it! Yo!)

I programmed an AI with GOOGLE API KEY to send a welcomed message to the user who just registered! The most of it is javascript programmed, no php! So the message sent to the user with window.onload = function() {}. But the sender name is the user name, so i want the name to appear as admin. Please help me @tynash and @sherizo. Please DM

Who kill the swag?

MORNING QUIZ! AMAZING QUESTIONS:
CHOOSE A QUESTION YOU CAN ANSWERED WITH ITS NUMBER:
1. Who first use Iphone?
2. Who first relate OT in swimming pool?
3. Who first be the firstgirl in U.S.A?
4. Who first create computer programming languages? (for webmasters).
6. Who first create an audio machine?
7. Who first have s*x under the TRAILER?
8. Who first be on YOCLIQ?
9. Who first be on FACEBOOK?
10. Who powered INSTAGRAM?
11. Which country is audiomack first appear? (for music listeners)
12. Who first wear ANKARA to SHOW?
13. Who first wear black socks to SCHOOL?
14. Who first create post on FACEBOOK?
15. Who is the richest between FACEBOOK admin, INSTAGRAM admin, WHATSAPP admin & TWITTER admin?
16. Who first swag to school?
17. Which country first colonalize a local country in the world?
18. Who first generate animation images?
19. Who first create mood emojis?
20. Who is the fastest human?
??????????????????????????????????
No Google search or other search engines. Ask from your patrtnership!!!

MORNING JOKES:
1. No matter riches you are, You will still have to walk into your bedroom.
2. Becuz i now visit her home, The 2nd week she was told she's being impregnant. Now mummy joshua con dey say nah me impregnant her cuz she saw me get out from her room!
3. When some boy see a girl being gifted many jwelleries, money and expensive goods, Some MALE will be like praying to God to turn them into FEMALE!
4. I was in the kitchen frying the pap, Now i'm hungry she told me to drink the rice! April fool.
5. When they say you are a strong man and very powerful! Bro, you are not a strong man untill you fight the LION and remove all it tooth.
6. Yes ma, i thaught Jesus left his blood becuz of man, but you are leading to death, Can boyfriend leave his blood for you?
7. Don't think you are wise, untill you have no believe in those Tortoise folktales!
8. Ten years ago you was in U.K, You came back home and dey telling all your people about beautiful as U.K is. Local Local (no dey travel again)!
Good morning!

Who knows this ugly politicians?